A Hat is a Hat of Course

August 4th, 2018

I had a dream where I return to a resort where I’ve stayed before.  A part of me believes I should have a my room reserved at this location.  I find my room close to the pool and walk in.  The room has changed.  They have made it more agreeable and amenable for more people to stay with me.  There are two rooms with beds in them and one room even has bunk beds.  It looks more generic than personalized but I do like the layout.  Considering this is a vacation space I think the layout works nicely.  I look for the bathroom and notice the door is closed.  I can hear someone inside using it.

Knowing I have to go to the bathroom I remember there being a restroom on the other end of the resort.  I recall something new about the resort.  I recall the entire resort being available for my needs.  I recall not only additional restrooms available but additional sleeping areas.  The choice is mine to make.  I walk out the door toward the pool on route to the other restroom.  There are people in the pool.  One woman is completely naked.  She walks on water.   She is walking toward another woman who is in the pool leaning against the pools inner wall.  Although she is a woman she has both male and female attributes.  The woman who walks on water, walks on the surface of the water toward the other woman. Before arriving in front of her she goes under the water and fondles the other woman’s private masculine parts.  I’m surprised at their open display of affection.  I wish I had time to be as free to enjoy that type of intimacy but I have to find a restroom.

I finally couldn’t wait any longer and woke up to go to the real world bathroom.  I did my business and returned to bed.  I quickly returned to the dream.

I am now entering the other bathroom where a man stands.  He is an Amish  man with a full beard with a soft breathable cotton shirt, leather suspenders and a relaxed look.  He wears a suede leather Amish style hat.  He sees me enter the restroom and salutes me by taking off his hat.  Except under the hat he has another hat.  He then proceeds to take the second hat off only to discover under that hat he has yet another hat.  This continues for about 5 hats.  The last hat on his head is small with a 5 inch brim and is tied under his neck.  Atop the crown of the hat are two small Moose with full antlers.  It feels like a magic trick as the outcome is completely unexpected.  Like a child amused with laughter we both laugh with full bellied joy.  It becomes apparent he is doing this to amuse me.  His interest in pleasing me touches my heart and soul.

Love

My second partner Michael who held 10 yrs of my life.

August 3, 2018

Last night I had a dream where I am in a line of people not quite sure what we are waiting for.  I am with my mother who is old and in a wheel chair.  I am protecting her.  Along the path where we walk are cutouts small rooms with 3 walls.  Occasionally people pause while they wait in line to reflect on what each room holds.  While standing in line your vision is restricted to the cutout room directly in front of you.  I am standing in front of my mom.  It is has been my belief we are at the end of the line whoever I become aware of a man who has been standing behind my mom.  I have missed noticing him because he has been engaged in each of the rooms as the line has moved.  I on the other hand have been waiting in line with my mom not entering the cutouts.  To satisfy my curiosity who might be standing behind my mom I walk behind her now in a position to see into the cutout where the man stands.  I discover the man in the room is Michael.  My second partner.  He looks amazingly beautiful.  All the reasons I fell in love with him come rushing back.  His hair glistens in the light of the sun and his beard seems to reflect the rays of the sun.  Yet even with all this love for him I feel I need to scold him for his actions.  I somehow feel he might have done some wrong against my mother.  I want him to know I stand to protect my mom.  I also feel he has hurt me.  A part of me if mad over the pain he has created in my life.

As I stand there in discussion with him, I begin to become aware of the dream.  Knowing I’m in a dream now I look at “Michael” and wonder what else might he be here to represent.  With my mind focused on OB and feeling the love deep within me.  I can feel it radiating out warmly by the sun reflecting off his golden hair.

My alarm rings and I wake up to snooze it.  I quickly close my eyes trying desperately to return to the dream.  My inner eye now sees cartoon characters.  These are very similar to yesterday’s except these appear to be presented for a mature audience.  The characters are dressed in cartoon suits, some I notice look like formal wear.  They seem to be gathering for a celebration.  I see their cartoon hair is black and well presented with clear delineation and  distinction.  They appear to be happy and proud.  My alarm rings a second time.

~~~~~~ DREAM ENDS

As I was journalling my dream and describing the cutout rooms I had a very strong feeling that each room represented a day in my life.  I seem to be stuck not engaging fully in each day because I am attached to the idea that I must care for my mother.  My mother in her wheel chair seemed unable to enjoy each day either.  I was unaware of Michael’s nearby presence because he was in engaged in life.  There is also the idea that I’m stuck in the past possibly morning the past.  I can’t see love in today.

First Little Girl In Space

Moon

July 22, 2018

I had an amazing dream last night.  I am traveling among the stars.  At the very end I thought I was laying here in bed watching an educational program on TV. The images in my head were so crystal clear and the sound on the television was so clearly audible.  The program was very interesting and fascinating.  The program I could tell was coming to an end.  They started talking about a little girl, the first little girl to travel in space.  She was taken on a shuttle mission to fix something on one of our space satellites and to the moon.  I can see the shuttle on the television flying past the satellite.  It is approaching a round object which at first looks fuzzy.  As we get closer, I immediately recognize it as the moon but it is not the moon we are accustomed to.  It is a space ship much like the Death Star in Star Wars with some major differences.  There are three lines that go across the surface of the sphere horizontally similar to the Death Star.  One at the top around the +60 degree longitude and two in the southern hemisphere around -15 and -45 degree longitude.  The lines are obviously viewing windows with blue light emanating from them.  Between the two southern lines is a circular disk similar to the Death Star except this one appears to have the ability to rotate.  The disk reminds me of the face on a quarts watch.  Along the general surface of the moon are randomly shaped crystals that serve as viewing portals.  The shuttle approaches the moon along the northern ring.  This ring forms a continuous window which tells the history of the moon from it’s inception.   The line doesn’t go all the way around.  I can not see where it ends but I can see where it begins.  The start of the window frame has a tapered aerodynamic shape.   I think to myself why don’t we board the moon because then we can look out through the windows.  I feel it has been such a long time since I’ve been on the moon.  I wonder if no one is on-board the moon right now.

I can see the shuttle that is carrying the little girl.  It looks like one of the triangular shaped stealth planes the government uses except this one is considerably thicker.  People can actually stand up in them and walk around.  The shuttle flies low in the sky allows me to clearly see detail.  It is apparent it is doing these maneuvers specifically for me to witness.  At one point it flies in a formation that allows me to see the tops of the wings which to my surprise are not dark grey like the rest of the aircraft but instead are a translucent white that conducts pastel shades of vibrant color.  It also becomes apparent that it has the capability to fly not only horizontally but vertically by raising a section of flaps on the white surface of the wings.  The flaps have an L shape when raised for this configuration.

Now earlier in the dream I am with a team of people.  We have the ability to move between dimensions.  I am in a world where everyone is asleep going about their business.  They are doing fun day to day things but they are asleep unaware of their total existence.   I am on an escorted tour of this world.  I break away from the tour because I want to know what they are choosing to hide from me and the rest of the world.  I can deduce that I am from this world and I too have been asleep for a very long time.  The minute anyone wakes up they come at you to suppress you and force you back into a sleep state.  They hold the reality in place for us to believe our subspace reality.

I come back to the tour guide and tell him that I have found an access door above this room.  He gives me a wink and a node and tells me to go ahead and explore it while he continues the tour for the remaining people in my party.  I climb to the highest place in the room and push the ceiling panels up.  The panels give way exposing other realms and other dimensions of existence.   I make my way out and I am able to see the world as it really is.  I have the ability to fly and do incredible things.  I seem to have no limits on my power to transcend space and time and move through dimensions.

The overlords quickly discover I have breached their barriers.  I use this opportunity to understand what they are trying to protect or guard against, why the do so and how I am being manipulated into believing something that is not entirely true or is not the complete truth of who I am.  Its the egg becoming the chicken and coincidentally overcoming fear.  At some point I must mature that time is now.

I am trying to evade the authorities. They are there to keep the peace but it is in their interest.  Now that I am awake, I have an inalienable right to be a full and ascended being to travel the universe and other dimensions to discover who I am.   I have learned the process and I understand I too can hide from them and slip past them.  They have been so focused on us down below that they have become somewhat myopic and have lost the ability to see in 360 degree views. This description seems to fit an analogy for which there are no words.  Every button that is now available to me I can push and experience.  I spend a great deal of time moving back and forth between dimensions.  On occasion they would find where I was and try to come at me.  I discover what triggers them to notice me which is when I focus my sight on them their reality begins to fall apart I seem to have the ability to see through them.  They desire form and I am trying to escape form.  Yet they have the ability to take form and move out of form.   They seem to have two states of form one is similar to our physical reality and one in a higher dimension and above that a pure etheric form.

This little girl had taken the space flight to fix a satellite and to see the moon.  I am thinking how could this little girl fix a satellite.  I see the moon and the many little portal crystals scattered all over the moon that made it look like a planet.  The many crystals watch me as I fly past them like people sitting on bleachers in a stadium cheering my passage. I look back to take in it’s beautiful golden metallic color.

What an amazing dream.

Vignette of a Daddy

The humanistically oriented has an aesthetic-artistic profile

July 18, 2018

DREAM 1:  I had a dream where I am rearranging my website to show images of my daddy poses.  My objective is to show what daddies look like.  There are three images of me as a daddy I choose to settle on for the website.

DREAM 2:  I had another dream where I invite friends to celebrate.  My wallet is full of money.  I take a bite of my wallet as if it was a sandwich.  I worry I can’t exchange the money I’ve chewed.  I close my wallet and pause to think what to do about the money I’ve chewed up.  I open my wallet a second time and discover the wallet is as if I had not bitten into it.  My wallet has recovered and has more money in it than before so much so that the money is falling out.   It is stuffed so thick it is busting at the seams.  Someone beside me tries to grab at my wallet and succeeds at taking money from me.  Angered by this,  I attack him pointedly targeting the return of my dollars.  I am successful at recovering my money.  Emboldened by this I go in for another grab at his money.  I am successful at getting his money in addition to my money.   I recognize I am in a dream and wonder if he is playing with me or testing my reaction in the dream.  How assertive am I with the things I want in life?

DREAM 3:  I then had another dream.  I am in a castle.  I contemplate how I might remodel it desiring to change the windows on the first floor.  There is a white bottle of of lotion sitting on the counter with black lettering along with a symbol that looks like a large K.  I am aware of a young man who is in the castle with me.  He has approached to be a potential boyfriend.  I know for him to be the one he must be able to read and understand the meaning of the symbol and writing on the bottle of lotion.  If he is able to understand then he is the one if he can’t then he is not.

Apex U-Boat

July 2, 2018

I am in the military.  The military has adopted and modified my invention that allows for space travel and travel to other dimensions.  They have adopted it for large scale use.  It is able to do simple functions by accessing other dimensions.  I worry that they have not incorporated love and passion into their formulas believing instead that those qualities are innate to being human and not applicable to their interests.

We are stationed in a bay.  I can see the mountains in the distance.  I can see the hills are smoking and projectiles are being flung in our direction.  The only way to survive is to board a u-boat.  I don’t feel I’m quite ready to transform and go into battle.   I board the u-boat and as it begins to sink in the water my consciousness is released and remains above the surface of the water.  I am now flying above the bay.  They are aware of my presence.

I reunite with them and they show me how they push the smoke into the barrel of the gun.  I have seen this before.  It is the opposite direction of what you would expect. This process creates a wormhole.  In this moment I pause and a thought arises, “They have reached a point of inevitable success.”  I realize I didn’t look at gaining strength in my endeavors.  I consider what it would take to acquire strength.  I find a cool place to ponder my goals.  I believe I can mingle unnoticed among regular people in a nearby restaurant.  I find an area in the rear of the restaurant by the cooling coil.  It reminds me of the engineering room on the Star Ship Enterprise where you see the warp drive pulsating with light.  Once again they find me and am forced to engage.  We activate the cooling coils and move them to a new location.  I can see the apex of this room.  I understand how space travel is mastered.

Baby Blue Ceremonial Dress

My mom and her sisters are all wearing similar dresses that my aunt Helen made.  The dresses are white and baby blue.  There is a room with some old sofas where some young adolescents are hanging out some are trying to sleep there.  The beds do not have mattresses just the springs upon which the cushions would go so they have laid comforters over the springs to lessen the pain.  They are installing a peep hole but this peep hole is about 3 inches in diameter and about a foot long with a large camera inside that allows you to look to the other side.  I pause to think, “That is the largest peep hole I’ve ever seen.”  My mom wears her dress ceremoniously along with her sisters.  I can see them crossing the street walking one after the other.  My mom changes into another dress immediately after the processional crossing.  I ask, why she took the dress off to which I’m not really given a straight answer.  I get the impression she wants to maintain its significance.

Button Recruiter

June 9th, 2018

Vignette:  I remember seeing large trucks that have encircled the city.  The trucks are so close to the pedestrians I feel trapped by them.  I am standing on the sidewalk and one of the trucks nearly runs over my toes.  It literally clips the tips of the souls of my shoes.

Main Dream: Someone calls me looking for a job so I become his recruiter.  He presents his qualifications including his medical records and I offer him assistance in preparing his resume for the questions he might be asked in the interview process.  He meets with my bosses yet my bosses aren’t aware that he was coached by me.  They are very impressed by his resume and he gets the job based on his preparedness.  Slowly over time it is revealed that I coached him in the process.  I hear someone say,  “No wonder he is so well prepared.”  I apparently don’t work close to their group I just happen to know a great deal about what they do and what they are looking to create. We are all sitting around a conference table.

I excuse myself and get up to go the the bathroom for number 2. As I enter the bathroom I am given a button to turn on the lights.   It functions as a remote control.  The button controls the lights in the house. including the bathroom.  They suggest I take the button with me into my waking life.  I sit on the pot to focus on relieving myself all the while examining the button in my hand.  Feeling relieved I return to the conference room holding my button.  I am told the button is a new piece of technology the group has been working on.  They  are offering me the button in recognition of my contribution to the technology by having prepped the guy.  They encourage me to take the button with me.  As they are explaining the technology I am sensing something is not quite right.  I still have the urge to pee.  Knowing I’m in a dream I tell them I have to really go to the bathroom.  They motion to me to press the button.  I press the button and immediately wake up in real life.

~~~~~ Dream Ends Here.

After waking up I thought how unusual that in the dream I had to use the bathroom.  I don’t remember ever using a restroom in a dream.  I have been in a dream bathroom before but never actually believed I was actually using the restroom to relieve myself.  I definitely didn’t go number 2 in my bed.  I remember being in the conference room and needing it.  I even excused myself to go.  I apparently knew where this dream bathroom was located.  It was in the bathroom where I was given the button.  So if that part of the dream only happened because I really needed to go then did the dream create a bathroom on the fly for me to use.  I remember it being a normal bathroom.  The buttons were on the counter.  I was told to take one and specifically to take one back with me implying that I was in a dream and I was expected to return.  At that moment I didn’t fully understand.  I assumed it meant to take it back to the conference room.  After using what I thought was number 2 and feeling relieved I took the button with me back to the conference room.  That’s when they explained what the button was for.  It was what they were creating.  It was the work for which they hired the guy I prepped for the job.  The button is a remote control to turn the light on.  I was to take it back with me into my waking life.  When I realize I still had to use the bathroom and attempted to excuse myself again they instructed me to push the button.  I immediately woke up.

When I woke up I recognized the button as something I already have in waking life.  Its a night light.

Last Word: I initially recorded the dream with my voice recorder but when I sat down to journal it I journaled it from memory.  Interestingly the vignette i didn’t remember until after I heard the recording and so I added it in.  The weird part is tonight I almost ran over a pedestrian.  I was coming up a main road and along the side walk were a line of people waiting to go into a bar / restaurant.  I wasn’t traveling that fast when a guy decided to cross the street.  There was a cross walk there but no light.  I thought he was waiting in line with the rest of the people standing on the sidewalk.  For some reason he just began crossing.  I slammed on the break and nearly ran over his toes.  I was just telling my Airbnb guest about what happened before I sat down at my computer to listen to the recording.  The first thing i hear is the vignette.  How coincidental that I nearly ran someone over just like in the dream.

My Work is Complete

April 29, 2018

Last night I had a dream where I am at work.  I discover there is a project where my boss needs my attention but he has omitted telling me about it.  I just happen to notice it as the paper work crosses my desk because it is due now.  There are several people named in the document and to my surprise I am also named.  I am surprised because I wouldn’t expect to see my name as a party to an agreement such as this.  Yet the agreement isn’t signed by anyone and yet it is due now.  I am conflicted because on the one hand if I carry this through to ensure it is ratified I appear to be doing it for self interest since I am named.  Yet I wasn’t aware of my name in the document until now.  It feels like it is intended for me as a beneficiary or benefactor of the agreement.  The parties are out of the country possibly in Brazil in a foreign land.  The challenge is I am not quite prepared to meet the many requirements which are formalities and process around the execution of the contract.  I think about all the steps I would need to do in order to arrange the many parts enumerated in the agreement.  It seems I can’t possibly carry out all it’s parts in the time frame allocated for it’s execution without an act of God.

Fearing defeat but actually not so much defeat since I had not pursued this option for myself.  I had nothing invested in it to feel any sense of loss.  The loss I feel is on behalf of my boss whose intent it was to execute this contract.  I know it wouldn’t have been written if he had not wanted it to take place even in naming me as a party.  I do not want to fail my boss even though I just found out about it. It is my desire to see his mission served whatever mission it may be.  His desire is my desire.

I then hear several people enter.  It is the hour that has come to pass.  Now is the time.  As I’m sitting there not knowing what to tell him.  I feel his presence come over my right shoulder as he whispers to me,  “I have taken care of it.  The work is done.”  Now as I look at the document time stands still the steps necessary for the process are complete one by one.  A signature and seal now appear. My work is complete.

 

 

Jacobs Ladder

This is an old dream that i had maybe a year ago (2017).  It has been forever present with me.  It was more than just a dream or vision.  It felt very real that it has not moved from my consciousness.  I think about it all the time wanting to know more about it.  Since my recent dream where I discovered I can replay an old dream I thought I should write this one down.  A year ago I wasn’t journaling my dreams yet I still have them and the most powerful ones I do still remember.  This is one of them.

I wake up in the dream to find that I have been asleep for many many years. I have not aged but somehow it is now at least 25 years into the future.   I don’t know this until later in the dream.  I am witnessing the President of the United States who doesn’t say a whole lot throughout the dream but his presence is known.  It seems only some people are aware of me yet I am there among them.  The President has an entourage of people around him constantly.   I am observing all that is going on and I somehow I know the topics under discussion.  We are all sleeping in close quarters several assistants along with the Press Secretary are constantly attending to the Presidents needs.  The President is one of the one’s that is not aware of my presence or at least he has not acknowledged me directly.   In the future they’ve made drugs such that they are no longer harmful.  Even drugs that were once illegal now have versions that can be taken for pure pleasure with no harmful side affects.  They have eliminated the substance abuse problem.

The President needs a prescription and therefore his personal medic is called in to administer the drug.  A young man enters who is a member of the a naval academy.  He is studying to be a doctor and can already prescribe medicine.  He comes in and notices me but doesn’t say anything so I’m not sure he can actually see me or simply senses my presence.   As the conversation continues I get more and more signals that confirm he is aware of me.  It is as if I can hear his thoughts.  The sound of his voice is so beautiful to me.  His name is Jacob.  He is such a caring individual with a deep curiosity for life.  His desires are noble.  He tells me he wants to change the world from the inside out.  Although he is working for a Republican President he himself is not a Republican.  He has only claimed to be a Republican to effect change.  We seem to hit it off and begin playing on each other bantering back and forth.  The Press Secretary also is fully aware and loves the young man and respects his naivete.  His innocence is simply intoxicating.  He tells me he finds me very attractive.  Something else about life in this century is that sexual expression is more openly accepted as an exchange of energy.  It’s not uncommon for people to be intimate and rejoice in one another’s presense.  He again tells me he finds me very attractive.  I ask for clarification to which he tells me that I am exactly the type of person he has always dreamt about being with.  I ask him if he is gay to which he says that’s a thing of the past its more about being with the one you connect with and love.  Somehow he understands I’m not from this time period.  He then shows me how they are intimate with each other freely male and female without any hangups.  He then comes to me and begins to pleasure me.  The feeling of pleasure is overwhelming.  I tell him I don’t date guys in their 20’s.  He again emphasizes that he is in love with me as I AM EXACTLY what he has dreamt about.  With his touch I can feel exactly what he is referring to.  Knowing what he knows, I too now feel him and sense the connection.  I am falling in love with this young navy cadet.  He is paying me more attention than his responsibilities.  He tells me to wait for him.  While I wait he tells me to experience others as he has demonstrated.   The sense of pleasure is overwhelming.  I can hear a bit of scuttle between him and the President as he has neglected his duties in spending time with me.  He then assures me that he has everything under control.  I can still over hear the conversation but it sounds like he is loosing his patience with the President.  I tell him I don’t want him to risk his career.  He then asks me if I would love him regardless meaning if he didn’t have a career would I still love him to which I say of course. I now realize I’ve always wanted someone like him.  I tell him to fulfill his duties and come home to sleep with me and cuddle with me.  He is welcome to sleep with me anytime.  I’m starting to get tired as sleep falls upon me.  He is now in my bed cuddled with me late at night.  I can feel his body pressed against my body.  We dream of a time when we can be together forever.

When I woke up in the morning the presence of him was gone.  I felt like I had allowed myself to fall asleep and allowed him to slip away.  In my desire to recapture that moment I heard a voice say “You are him. You are the connection you seek.”

And Jacob went out from Beer-sheba, and went toward Haran. And he lighted upon the place, and tarried there all night, because the sun was set; and he took one of the stones of the place, and put it under his head, and lay down in that place to sleep. And he dreamed, and behold a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven; and behold the angels of God ascending and descending on it. And, behold, the LORD stood beside him, and said: ‘I am the LORD, the God of Abraham thy father, and the God of Isaac. The land whereon thou liest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed. And thy seed shall be as the dust of the earth, and thou shalt spread abroad to the west, and to the east, and to the north, and to the south. And in thee and in thy seed shall all the families of the earth be blessed. And, behold, I am with thee, and will keep thee whithersoever thou goest, and will bring thee back into this land; for I will not leave thee, until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of.’ And Jacob awaked out of his sleep, and he said: ‘Surely the LORD is in this place; and I knew it not.’ And he was afraid, and said: ‘How full of awe is this place! this is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven.’

— Genesis 28:10-17 Jewish Publication Society (1917)

The Color of Change

https://www.flickr.com/photos/restlessglobetrotter/1849358056

I had a dream where I am observing someone’s boss treat her employees in a way that is racially discriminating.  I’m very disturbed by the comments and decide to protest along with my friend Dinah who is with me.  The woman discriminated against two races.  I am feeling alone in my protest even since it is just Dinah and myself.  We decide to take it further and confront the offices and demand change. There is a long line of people waiting to get in the building.  Unbeknownst to me Dinah tells me that all these people are here waiting in line to support my protest.  I’m amazed at how many people are here.  As we approach to prove our case to the highest levels of management everyone is setting their intents as thoughts into the air.  I can visually see the thoughts as light grey clouds.  As I look at the clouds I notice that the clouds of thoughts seem to respond to my viewing them directly.  Instead of grey they become pink and some are blue, yellow, orange, green and a variety of other colors.  At first I’m puzzled believing it can’t be me causing the color within their thoughts.  Looking away to test the theory I can show that my direct focus on the clouds causes them to come alive with color.  I feel like Rudolph trying not to call too much attention to my colors that I’m imploring. Everyone there supporting me is taken aback by my ability to infuse color into their thoughts with supplications for change.

I’m now face to face with the highest levels of management who ask me to walk a plank to cross over and prove myself.   I’m feeling tired and drowsy and my vision is blurry.   I don’t feel capable of crossing and I’m assured death should I fall.  Instead I lean my forehead against the wall and pray.  In that moment I awaken from the dream.