Snatch the Beaver

BeaverI had a dream where I am with a group of people who I work closely with.  I am complaining about the working conditions and trying to advocate for radical change.  I don’t think it should matter what people wear to work.  To test me and my conviction for change the women of the group begin coming to work half dressed without their underwear.  They are completely naked from the waist down. 

There is a part of me that wants to accept the new conditions because it means a sense of freedom I have longed for yet there is another part of me who wants to look away.  How do you pretend to avoid looking at the beaver and not give away my level of discomfort?  To push my limits, more of the women start to come around me flagrantly expressing their beavers.  I become so uncomfortable I literally have to do my breathing exercise.  Can I withstand the new terms of conditions which I am wholly responsible to advocating.  Is this more than I bargained for?

Inside the Silver Fish

Sucker FishI had a dream where I am attending the university with a bunch of my engineering student friends.  It is a university I attended previously because I am familiar with the location of all the classes and the names of the many buildings.  There is a great sense of camaraderie here among the guys.  There is a social group I belong to which is not part of the engineering curriculum but is geared toward developing one’s spiritual awareness.  We go off on an adventure along a river bank where we are instructed to catch the tiny little fish that live in the stream and eat them.  The fish are so tiny they are almost transparent and to my surprise they are incredibly tasty; a true delicacy.


Later when we return to classes I suspect something is different about me.  I am changed in some way from the inside. I decide to urinate and capture my urine in the trough where I can examine the urine to see what is inside me and maybe get an idea of what has changed.  The feeling is intuitive without knowing for sure I simply sense it.  In my urine I find the tiny fish I ate earlier in the day which are not dead but very much alive and thriving in my body.  They are multiplying and growing.  I can actually see them swimming in this pond that is my urine.


Scared … I run to tell one of my classmates and the professor.  Instead I run across my best friend Dinah.  I tell her what is happening to me.  She is incredulous and does not want to believe me.  Thinking I might have been imagining it, I go back to the trough where I captured my urine.  My urine is still there but it has begun to evaporate.  The fish are getting larger and their environment is getting smaller.  I suspect the fish are consuming the nutrients in my urine because they are now very large and no longer transparent.  They have given up their transparency for a beautiful silver coating. 


I know what I am seeing in this trough is a reflection of what is within me.  Fish must be growing in me. My dilemma is how do I get them out?  There is almost little  urine left for them to live in and feed on. 


A thought comes to my mind; how nice would it be to capture the fish and put them in my aquarium.  I then have a second thought; considering how prolific they are they would soon over run my tank.  As I reach down into the trough, one of the fish jumps on me in an attempt to escape his diminishing world.  This fish has the ability to suckle on me making it almost impossible for me to rid myself of it.  I’m distressed.  I want to be free of the fish inside me but I also want to ensure their safety.