October 5, 2018
In last night’s dream I am part of a group of people. I am with a partner she seems to be androgynous of both male and female sex. At times I refer to her in the feminine and at other times she appears to me in the masculine. We are getting married or are engaged. Her life seems easy to me. She happens to be at the right place at the right time. In one instance she invests in a start up and makes a huge amount of money. I want to bring something to the relationship that is special and of my own doing. I wonder if there are interesting start up that I can invest in that would bring similar returns. I decide to buy some stock. The stock certificates are guaranteed to have a gain. This certificate is multi faceted. It is a marriage certificate, a birth certificate and a stock certificate all at the same time. I place the certificate on a sheet of cake upon which the marriage cake will be placed. I plan on revealing the certificate when the cake is cut.
My jealousy is showing a bit toward her easy gains. I want the time to come soon for me to reveal my surprise but so many other things have to be done in preparation before we can have our celebration and reveal. I seem to have a deja-vue within the dream and recall having been here before. I seem to know the events which will play out. I try to recall where I’ve come to know the truth. I recall a movie like Titanic and realize my life is playing out just like in the movie. I seem to know the ending. I remember from the movie that the couple have a fight and the cake is thrown in the ocean. Along with the cake so too are lost the certificates. In the end they live together happily but without knowledge of what was lost. I feel I have to do something to change the course of events and maybe I can recover the cake and certificates so we can have a much better life together. I go to her to discuss what she is going to wear for the wedding. She shows me a black leather harness. In my mind, I think oh no how could you wear a leather harness to your wedding. Without me even saying anything she replies, “It’s in the way you wear it.” She who is now in the masculine form twists the suspenders so as to make a new use for the harness. She then proceeds to create bearded tassels which look very similar to my beard in color and form. She / He gives the impression it will keep us together. I look at him and think how beautiful he is even though I’m not fond of the leather harness. In the back of my mind I still want to find a way to safeguard the certificates so they aren’t lost to sea or does happiness lie not in material wealth.