ast night I had a dream where I am sitting with my family huddled around a small heater that barely produced enough heat for them. They asked if I could possibly give them a new heater. Of course, I told them. You can have anything you need. I materialize a bigger heater for them enough to heat the space in which we were huddled. Without anyone saying anything to me, I am suddenly aware of the death of my father. I immediately stand up. He died while crossing the street. I observe that no one is saddened by his death not even my mother. Everyone has gracefully come to terms with his death.
I turn away to do my own inner reflection. Within me I can see the ground upon which his body lay. Going back in time I re-live his last breath. “No, you have to be kidding,” he says to himself inwardly. He looks up and points to the sky and smiles. He is experiencing a vision. “They have come for me,” he says; those where his last words.
I now understood why everyone had gracefully accepted his death. In his death he received everything he had been searching for.
As my own inner reflection faded within the dream I began to awaken. Lying in bed I came to full awareness. Above my bed was floating the image of my father. Instinctively, I reached out to grab his ethereal form to pull him toward me. My left hand went straight for his heart like an arrow released from the bow of my heart. I grabbed hold of him capturing his heart in the palm of my hand. I could see his final expression as he surrendered his life before my eyes. His image slowly faded. I opened my hand and there in the palm of my hand was a handful of the etheric substance of his being. It was hunter green in color and ran down the palm of my hand and fingers. I held up my hand to the dawn of the morning light shining through my bedroom window. Its consistency was dense yet still transparent. My palm was completely green. Like tiny fiber filaments angel hair of some sort; it clung to my hand forming a web between my fingers that obscured the light. I compared both palms. One was clearly green while the other was my normal skin tone.
I placed my palm on my heart. Could my father have really died? I’d have to call home first thing in the morning. Somehow I knew this wasn’t about my real father but more about what my father represented. My father represents my struggle with addiction and my desire for ultimate truth. Death is a liberation from bondage; a bondage to my physical desire. Was I now free from bondage? I then remembered that last night as I began my meditation I tried to visualize the moment in which I came into existence. I wanted to know why I had decided to come into physical form. What was my desire? What was my purpose for coming here? What did I want to accomplish?
I decided to meditate and see if I could glean anything more from this dream vision. As I meditated, I began to see tree people. These trees were moonstruck; solid black shadows against a white backdrop. They looked like palm trees with ostrich feet. There were about 7 of them of varying heights. They did a two step dance of sorts to let me know they were happy with the outcome.
My alarm sounded. I quickly hit the snooze button and returned to my meditation. Seeing that I had returned, the ostrich’s regrouped and returned to their tree dance. Clarity sharpened as they came in closer into view. The showed me there feet and how they walked. Still moonstruck all I could see was the outline of their shadow. My alarm sounded a second time. It was time to awaken.
What does is all mean, I’m really not sure but I know as I live it and hold onto it more will be revealed. I’m exactly where I need to be.
I had a dream. I am at home visiting family for the holidays. My cousin Dieanna is there who I haven’t seen in years. We step out onto the porch late at night. I can see the moon lit sky and the bare tree branches. She offers me a Juanita bud, sparks the flame to light and passes it to me. She doesn’t know that I don’t smoke. I feel I shouldn’t reject her offering so I take it and pretend to inhale. As I exhale, the cool damp night creates the faux smoke.